On zombies

In a small departure from the usual rational, scientific content here...

53%... which isn't that bad. Seeing as I don't own a gun (illegal in Britain), this cuts my survival chances quite a bit (although I am good with improvising weapons, killing zombies with a frying pan with a nail attached to it, anyone?).

Seeing as when (when, not if) the dead rise we all need to be prepared, here are my top three tips for surviving Z-Day, based on common zombie fallacies (read: the following happen in all cheesy zombie flicks).

• DON'T under any circumstances go looking for loved ones or friends. It may seem harsh, but they may already be zombified, and it will distract you from your primary goal. Survival.
• DON'T set zombies on fire, unless they are dead (as in, really dead), or you have contained them (i.e. trap them in a building, then blow it up). The only thing worse than a zombie trying to eat your brains, is a zombie trying to eat your brains while aflame. Fire will not kill zombies quickly, as they need only about 1% of normal human bodily functions. However, if you are disposing of zombie corpses (as you should to prevent infection) fire is a good method of doing so.
• Finally, if you are in a group DON'T, for the love of brains, split up. Single prey is much easier to surround and kill than a large group (why d'you think wildebeest and the like travel in hundred-strong packs?). You can watch each others' backs and get a better all-round view of things if you stick together, too.

Good luck, stay informed, stay alive.
In a small departure from the usual rational, scientific content here...<br /><a href="http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/zombie" style="background: transparent url(http://www.oneplusyou.com/q/img/bb_badges/zombie.jpg) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%; color: rgb(255, 255, 255); text-decoration: none; display: block; width: 385px; height: 209px; padding-top: 35px; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial; font-family: Times New Roman,sans-serif; font-size: 60px; text-align: center;"><span style="display: block;"><br/>53%</span></a>... which isn't that bad. Seeing as I don't own a gun (illegal in Britain), this cuts my survival chances quite a bit (although I am good with improvising weapons, killing zombies with a frying pan with a nail attached to it, anyone?).<br /><br />Seeing as when (when, not if) the dead rise we all need to be prepared, here are my top three tips for surviving Z-Day, based on common zombie fallacies (read: the following happen in all cheesy zombie flicks).<br /><ul><li>DON'T under any circumstances go looking for loved ones or friends. It may seem harsh, but they may already be zombified, and it will distract you from your primary goal. Survival.</li><li>DON'T set zombies on fire, unless they are dead (as in, <span style="font-style: italic;">really</span> dead), or you have contained them (i.e. trap them in a building, then blow it up). The only thing worse than a zombie trying to eat your brains, is a zombie trying to eat your brains while aflame. Fire will <span style="font-style: italic;">not</span> kill zombies quickly, as they need only about 1% of normal human bodily functions. However, if you are disposing of zombie corpses (as you should to prevent infection) fire is a good method of doing so.</li><li>Finally, if you are in a group DON'T, for the love of brains, split up. Single prey is much easier to surround and kill than a large group (why d'you think wildebeest and the like travel in hundred-strong packs?). You can watch each others' backs and get a better all-round view of things if you stick together, too.</li></ul>Good luck, stay informed, stay alive.

Why would Paris Hilton be safe in a zombie apocalypse?

Answer: They want braiiiinnnns.

And she certainly doesn't have one. London's 'Metro' newspaper has a report detailing how, through legal documents filed as part of a court case, it has come to light just how air-headed the socialite really is.

Apparently she 'gets a new cell phone, like, every two weeks' and has never seen a phone bill in her life. She was a producer for the 2006 flop 'Pledge This!' (and it is this that the whole court case is about, according to the plaintiffs she failed to promote the film effectively), but when asked about this role, she didn't even know what a producer does! 'Help get cool people in the cast', apparently.

My main issue isn't really with morons like Hilton, if they want to stay stupid and aren't interested in the world around them, fine. However, what really annoys me is that they (either actively or passively) encourage young people to follow in their footsteps! 'Oh, I don't care about science or other subjects because I'll just become a socialite instead of getting a job!'. This is mainly girls, although footballers do exactly the same to teenage boys' brains.

I'm sure that when a new medical procedure or chemical (developed by scientists; those who do care) saves their lives or those of their family, they'll be singing a different tune.
Answer: They want <span style="font-style: italic;">braiiiinnnns</span>.<br /><br />And she <a href="http://www.metro.co.uk/fame/article.html?Files_reveal_Paris_Hiltons_secret_life&in_article_id=650665&in_page_id=7">certainly doesn't have one</a>. London's 'Metro' newspaper has a report detailing how, through legal documents filed as part of a court case, it has come to light just how air-headed the socialite really is.<br /><br />Apparently she 'gets a new cell phone, like, every two weeks' and has never seen a phone bill in her life. She was a producer for the 2006 flop 'Pledge This!' (and it is this that the whole court case is about, according to the plaintiffs she failed to promote the film effectively), but when asked about this role, she didn't even know what a producer <span style="font-style: italic;">does</span>! 'Help get cool people in the cast', apparently.<br /><br />My main issue isn't really with morons like Hilton, if they want to stay stupid and aren't interested in the world around them, fine. However, what really annoys me is that they (either actively or passively) encourage young people to follow in their footsteps! 'Oh, I don't care about science or other subjects because I'll just become a socialite instead of getting a job!'. This is mainly girls, although footballers do exactly the same to teenage boys' brains.<br /><br />I'm sure that when a new medical procedure or chemical (developed by scientists; those who do care) saves their lives or those of their family, they'll be singing a different tune.